I first discovered this song on one of my all time favorite movies, Now and Then, so that is what I expected when searching for the song. But no. I found this FABULOUS video. So worth viewing. For reals. Like watch it. Now. Did you click yet? DO IT! :)
So I picked this song because I have taken on an endeavor that I have never tried before. I am attempting to go 1 month without ANY: candy, desserts, pointless sugar snacks (fruit snacks and the like), and no soda. When I did a fruit and veggie detox last spring I inadvertently went 3 weeks without any candy, etc because I was determined to do the detox to it's finish. And I did. I've also quit soda numerous times "successfully." I say that because I always go back. But I have never quit sweets like this before. And I am extremely proud to say that I have been successful thus far. I began on May 1st and will continue until June 1st. BUT I will not resume sugar stuff full force, just on occasion; I will no longer buy "study snacks" in the form of candy. I will have the rare dessert. I will try to make healthier desserts that still give me a sugar fix, but not in a terrible way.
I have been doing this endeavor with Michael. He isn't a big candy or dessert fan but he did give up both the sweets and soda. Having someone to do this with has been a big help. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be and I think that is because of the support of having someone do it with me. Now the last week is beginning and he is gone on a family vacation. Due to his physical absence, I have discovered that I am very much a boredom snacker. I don't really crave candy or cookies or whatever unless I'm massively bored. The first week was nothing. The last week however will be brutal. :/
I kinda miss gummy bears and chocolate and chocolate chip cookies, but other than that, I actually haven't missed all that much.
This is my random blog post for now. Wish me luck on completing this final week. :)
Seriously though, did you watch that video????
May 26, 2013
May 12, 2013
"It's Only Life"
There is something I tend to always forget when I go through hard times, no matter how hard they actually are. I tend to forget that, it's only life.
This semester was the second hardest semester of my life. The first is when I was a second semester freshman at USU and I became so depressed that I just shut down; on family, on friends and definitely on school. I got one C that semester and the rest were F's (I think 3 or 4). The worst part was, up until 1 month before the semester was over, I did not care that I was failing. By the time I did start to care, it was far to late to change anything, however I started to get mental and emotional help from a counselor and after a few weeks, with the support of my parents, I got on an anti-depressant. I am recounting this because, A) I'm not ashamed of it; I had a medical condition that I still sometimes struggle with but I got help, and B) I know what it is like to be at the very bottom and know how it feels to know that it would be easier to give up but that it would be far better to get back up.
I'm not sure if I've ever fully explained to anyone why I got the tattoo that I have (Chinese symbol for Dream). When I was in high school, I went through a very dark, depressed time but I tried to hide it and fight it by dreaming up big dreams and goals for myself. When I went through that second semester at USU, everything I had been hiding from came screaming towards me and it was ready to fight. It was really rough. Yet there was NOT A SINGLE day I felt like giving up. The reason for that is for all the many wild and far fetched dreams that I had come up with and, more importantly, the desire to accomplish as many of those dreams as I could. I got my tattoo because I got through something incredibly difficult and while I had family and friends who didn't give up on me, it was my personal goals, desires, and Dreams that got me through. My tattoo is my constant reminder that my dreams are worth fighting for no matter how hard life gets. My tattoo reminds me that when I went through my hardest time, I got through it and I can, and will, get through whatever else life throws at me.
What's my point, you ask? For a lot of reasons, this past semester was exceptionally hard. This semester took everything out of me--emotionally, physically, and mentally. I have never been exhausted in every facet of my life. I did not do very well academically and that, unfortunately, was the wake up call that I need to let me know that I was not passionate or even excited about the program I was in. I have an extremely high respect for teachers, but I am not meant to be a teacher. So I have switched programs. I feel so strongly that it is the right fit for me. It will lead me to a dream that I have had since I was a nanny to two incredible boys--own/run my own daycare/preschool.
I have gone through a lot to get to a point where I was happy with every part of my life. I just wish that I had figured this part out sooner rather than later, but the point is I got there. It will be hard, it is not part of mine and my parents original plan, but it truly is a better plan.
My last thing for this insanely long post is: Happy Mother's Day.
First, to my own incredibly loving, supportive, creative, hardworking, inspiring mother. She has never, ever given up on me even when it would be extremely easy to do so. I love you mom.
Second, to Dana, my caring, loving and supportive step mom. I give her too hard of a time sometimes but I am extremely grateful to have her in my life.
Third, to my grandmothers and aunts who have always been such wonderful inspirations.
Fourth, to my sisters Amelia, Sophie, and Lesley for being such great examples to me about what it means to be a mother.
Fifth, to all the mothers who have taken care of me in some fashion--Sharon Jackson, Diane Wilson, Shauna Horner, Regina Woolston, and Lori Gorski. I am grateful for the support and love you all have shown me in your own way.
This semester was the second hardest semester of my life. The first is when I was a second semester freshman at USU and I became so depressed that I just shut down; on family, on friends and definitely on school. I got one C that semester and the rest were F's (I think 3 or 4). The worst part was, up until 1 month before the semester was over, I did not care that I was failing. By the time I did start to care, it was far to late to change anything, however I started to get mental and emotional help from a counselor and after a few weeks, with the support of my parents, I got on an anti-depressant. I am recounting this because, A) I'm not ashamed of it; I had a medical condition that I still sometimes struggle with but I got help, and B) I know what it is like to be at the very bottom and know how it feels to know that it would be easier to give up but that it would be far better to get back up.
I'm not sure if I've ever fully explained to anyone why I got the tattoo that I have (Chinese symbol for Dream). When I was in high school, I went through a very dark, depressed time but I tried to hide it and fight it by dreaming up big dreams and goals for myself. When I went through that second semester at USU, everything I had been hiding from came screaming towards me and it was ready to fight. It was really rough. Yet there was NOT A SINGLE day I felt like giving up. The reason for that is for all the many wild and far fetched dreams that I had come up with and, more importantly, the desire to accomplish as many of those dreams as I could. I got my tattoo because I got through something incredibly difficult and while I had family and friends who didn't give up on me, it was my personal goals, desires, and Dreams that got me through. My tattoo is my constant reminder that my dreams are worth fighting for no matter how hard life gets. My tattoo reminds me that when I went through my hardest time, I got through it and I can, and will, get through whatever else life throws at me.
What's my point, you ask? For a lot of reasons, this past semester was exceptionally hard. This semester took everything out of me--emotionally, physically, and mentally. I have never been exhausted in every facet of my life. I did not do very well academically and that, unfortunately, was the wake up call that I need to let me know that I was not passionate or even excited about the program I was in. I have an extremely high respect for teachers, but I am not meant to be a teacher. So I have switched programs. I feel so strongly that it is the right fit for me. It will lead me to a dream that I have had since I was a nanny to two incredible boys--own/run my own daycare/preschool.
I have gone through a lot to get to a point where I was happy with every part of my life. I just wish that I had figured this part out sooner rather than later, but the point is I got there. It will be hard, it is not part of mine and my parents original plan, but it truly is a better plan.
My last thing for this insanely long post is: Happy Mother's Day.
First, to my own incredibly loving, supportive, creative, hardworking, inspiring mother. She has never, ever given up on me even when it would be extremely easy to do so. I love you mom.
Second, to Dana, my caring, loving and supportive step mom. I give her too hard of a time sometimes but I am extremely grateful to have her in my life.
Third, to my grandmothers and aunts who have always been such wonderful inspirations.
Fourth, to my sisters Amelia, Sophie, and Lesley for being such great examples to me about what it means to be a mother.
Fifth, to all the mothers who have taken care of me in some fashion--Sharon Jackson, Diane Wilson, Shauna Horner, Regina Woolston, and Lori Gorski. I am grateful for the support and love you all have shown me in your own way.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)